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  1. So I going to rant about this cause this is the only way I going to get my anger out.

    Basically, me, brother, and mom are out eating dinner. All three of us had a big bowl of noodles, and it was all nice and quiet except for our civil conversation of whether or not mom moves our curry shop from its current food court location to another another failing food court location (apparently she likes that area cause it cheaper). 

    This is where this fucking argument start:
    Mom: *finished half a bowl* Okay i am full, Haru (for internet sake i going to use my username) you should stop eating cause i don’t want you to stretch out your stomach cause you are already eating a lot and gaining weight. Besides you can always eat it later at night.
    Haru: Fine, but i not going to eat anything after 9 you know….T __ T (Nardz told me that eating anything after 9 will make u gain weight more easily)
    Mom: fine you can keep eating if you want then …*already annoyed*
    Haru: *eats like 7 more bites and all is left in the bowl is like the meat and the veggies….i ate all the noodles* okay i full
    Mom: and now you say you are full why the heck did you change your decision???? and why did you just agree when i asked you?
    Haru: cause i was still hungry …and i agreed with you in the beginning cause i know you are going to nag me into changing my decision if i kept eating, so i said fine so you would keep your mouth shut.
    Mom: Now why would i do that??? I don’t do that.
    Haru:Cause mom you are the type of person who thinks they are always right and force other people to agree with you.
    *mom continues to deny this and gets more pissed off at me and brother is like totally back off from this argument*
    Haru: and now you are angry at me like how i am angry at you.
    Mom: no i not and you don’t know that.
    Haru: I know you are cause I have the same type of personality as you. 
    *mom stop speaking about this in the restaurant but in the parking lot*
    Mom: *in tone of voice you will find when bullies are saying shit about you in a joking manner*  u know what i bet if we flipped Haru’s nice side, we get shit. (basic translation from chinese)
    Haru: you are still angry at me… T _ T 
    Mom: No I not, I just don’t get why you are making a big fuss about this small thing
    Haru: Cause I sick of this.(I just sick of mom trying to making change my decisions everytime it not something she wants and “politely” insults me if i still disagree with her and show my anger.) 

    So to summarize, for ever freaking argument i have with my mom, mom keeps asking me why I so anger for such a small thing. From my view, I just pissed off at the shit i get from her when i disagree with her, seriously how the fuck do i stay calm when your own mother insults you for literally 20 years???? How the fuck do u stay calm when your own mother was basically a bullying you emotionally without realizing it when you are growing up, especially trying to find who you are when you were a teenager?? (seriously these are the questions i wanted to ask my mom but will never get the answers to)

Melani Sub Rosa © by Rafael Martin